I got excited talking about my pug family so I decided to talk about my human parents. I will dedicate a post to each of them because they are family too.
As far as I'm concerned Scotland is the greatest country ever. They brought us shortbread cookies, men wearing kilts, bagpipes, Robert the Bruce, Mary Queen of Scots, men wearing kilts, the Loch Ness monster, William Wallace, Haggis, the Highlands, men wearing kilts, the Stone of Scone, The Wicked Tinkers, Bonnie Prince Charlie, purple heather (the national flower), the Firth of Forth, Robert Burns, men wearing kilts, the Peel P50 and Sean Connery... I mean what's not to like!
Here I am modeling the Timmerman tartan (Ok, so this may not be the Timmerman tartan but it's a kilt with a matching hat):
My human mom Traci is a Timmerman. Timmermans are strong stock and you don't want to mess with us. In olden times, Timmermans could squash you with a huge caber if they didn't like the way you conducted yourself. Today, we just serve legal papers and sue you for all you're worth.
There are so many reasons to be proud of being a Timmerman.
Reason #1, we are related to Robert Burns the famous Scottish poet (actor Gerard Butler really wants to play our ancestor in a Robert Burns movie... and incidently he also owns a pug!). I'm listening to Robert Burns now (I should add this to my books of the month) but yeah, don't understand a thing he says but I'm sure it's great!
The fake Robert Burns
The real Robert Burns
Reason #2, only the coolest people are Timmermans. Case in point, I'm a Timmerman... Traci's a Timmerman... Maren's a Timmerman. Need I say more?
Reason #3, we're Scottish! Everyone wants to be Scottish. Because if it's not Scottish, it's crap!
Here are some of my favorite Timmermans:
Traci - my mom - we like to cook, clean and nap together. "T" is for Traci and Timmerman.
Maren - my aunt - we like to dress me in pet clothes and play together. Aunt Maren is 98% Scottish.
Michael - my uncle - we like to fly planes together.
Sandy - my cousin - we like to eat and run around together. 
Here's a Scottish joke:
Three Scotswomen (they are neighbors) were walking home at night. Along the way they find a Scotsman passed out under a wagon. His upper body is under the wagon and they can't see who he is; however, they would like to help him get home. The first woman looks under his kilt and says, "It's not my husband". The second woman looks under his kilt and says, "It's not my husband". The third woman looks under his kilt and says, "Why he's not even from our village!"
8 comments:
Oh, Riley, you are hilarious!
And guess what? Adam told me before we got married that his family was Scottish, and he wanted to wear a kilt at our wedding.
He was outed at Thanksgiving dinner, when I told his family that he wanted to represent their Scottish heritage, and they stated that they weren't Scottish. Fun!
The Timmermans are pretty awesome. And men wearing kilts are awesome too. Hopefully I can wed someone Scottish and he'll wear his kilt all the time.
thank you, scotland, for gerard butler in a kilt!
aye, that loon is crackin.
Best. Post. EVER! Timmermans are tough people! You did forget to mention one thing - Timmerman is also a 2% German name. That's why we are extra extra tough.
I think that Gerard Butler needs to play Robert Burns so I can say I'm family to get on the movie set and then we can meet and fall in love and then he'll be your uncle. How do you like them apples?
Apologies Riley! I hope I have ammended the tagging to your satisfaction.
Kristina, that's a very funny story about Adam! I'm surprised he thought he could pull it off. It's especially funny that he was outed at Thanksgiving dinner! I bet he's never fibed (even a little) again. But I must admit I too would pretend to be Scottish just to wear a kilt. It's sad but so true. I just can't lie to you. I'm too afraid that things might be said on Thanksgiving '08.
Amander, oh Amander! You are such a great friend. You tagged me special like! I knew there must have been something that pulled you away right when you were going to put me on your tag list. I knew you wouldn't forget. Guess what? I'm up to #10 for reasons we are friends. We both want to wed someone Scottish and he'll be wearing a kilt all the time!
Rychelle, amen to that sister! Amen to that!
Maren. Best. Aunt. EVER! It's true. It's true. I did leave out the German side of the family. But can you blame me when Gerard Butler is Scottish and I had to find a reason to get him on my blog? Maybe one day he will google his name and find my blog and then find you through my blog and then marry you because you are so funny and charming. You'll thank me for spending so much time on our 98% Scottish hertiage when that day comes. But let it be said that Timmermans are also of tough German stock... yet another reason to not mess with us. Ich bin ein Timmerman-liener!
My dear pug friend, how many puppies are you having? And are you going to have them natural-like? You are keeping me awake with anticipation of your news. I hope all is going well!
Riley, I just noticed one of your favorite movies is Best in Show - MINE TOO. Even more reasons for us to be friends!
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